When it comes to the word journey the first thing that pops to mind is a picture of a car, plane or a route one uses.
In my view, journey is a huge word when put in the context of traversing earth. See, the moment you begin life so much is set and expected of you.
I’ll be the first to admit that initially as a carefree child it makes no sense but as one tends to grow it takes a tall order especially if no one close enough to you has walked a similar path.
Well, truth be told – I, like many of you, have had my share in this journey called ‘life’.
Today I’ll give you a glimpse of it albeit the entirety won’t be feasible since I’m still ‘walking life’ and some past events are best left for an all encompassing book.
With life’s journey comes change. And boy has change been a constant in my life. I’ll take you through various phases and title them accordingly.
First up is living. It all started growing up in Kenya. So many great and not so great things happened. But my pivotal point was coming back to Rwanda after so many years away in Kenya. Just like that, I was back to my roots. Something I don’t take lightly. Back home I have learnt to be independent, to trust again but most of all to put my full trust in God’s sovereign plan over my life. It’s not easy hacking life away from all the familiar things and people you’ve grown up with. They anchor you into being safe and secure but when you learn to soar they can do little to help you but hope and pray for your best.
So basically I went from living the pampered by momma and constant bickering with them siblings life to the solely dependent on God kind of life.
I came here with only my clothes and lived with my relatives. As is sometimes possible collusions happen and parting ways is the only wise way to attain peace.
All didn’t go south though, I got to stay with great family friends even if it was merely two weeks tops to which I moved to a place closer to my new job then. I lived alone, like the amateur I was, got into a lot of trouble and absolutely had a time of my life. It was what it was until I moved to live with my awesome roommate Sophie. She was and is going to be my most awesome roomie. I’ve never had a roommate so hers and mine was a beautiful friendship that was born out of it all. To be honest I’d write another blog about her when I get the chance to.
Currently, I am back to living alone just because she got a transfer to Nairobi *sniff sniff.
I might get backlash for not having this as the first in line but this topic comes second because it’s heavy. Who I am, my tricks to survival is because of my family. My immediate family to be precise. From the time I was little I had them. The good, bad and ugly days were intertwined with them. Still are. I cry over the phone with them. I laugh out loudly at the endless inside jokes that one of us brings up. I get them. They get me. Even when one of us goes astray, life has taught me to have some faith. Our parents strived to live a righteous life in our little eyes as we grew up and if anything without a doubt, life and Love directs us to the path of righteousness. As with you and your family there is that one thing that keeps you grounded. For my family, that has to be our faith.
To momma, DTM, Fifi and BJM y’all are the most precious gifts I have been given by God in this journey I daily traverse. Love cover each of you no matter how far apart we are from each other.
Also, this post titled Dad is an homage I wrote to my pa who turned 19 the other day up in heaven. I miss you daily ❤
Weight and a health conscience
Let me be honest, I stumbled on my weight loss journey. When I moved to Rwanda I was as clueless as to what my health was about and how it was resulting to my weight issues. Simply put, I never put so much thought to what I fed my body with. I just ate anything edible to mankind with no restrictions. Although I don’t often post my before and after pictures as I should rightly do, doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Truth be told, it has been one amazing journey. Prior to this, I had never known what it was to weigh less from the time I was little. And if ever I was slimmer that had to do with some stress which I would quickly outgrow and revert to eating back to my bigger size.
If you may my weight had its fair share of the yo-yo effect. To this day, I still have my moments of yo-yo weight gain but in a more manageable way now.
To be honest it started with the good old tired of how I couldn’t fit in the cute dresses I saw on sale or the gifts from well meaning friends. Then I had many endless health discomforts. I did a lot of reading and research to which I discovered I was suffering from celiac disease and it all made perfect sense. I talked to a doctor suggested by a friend. She advised me to try the gluten free diet before making the appointment with her. I had no medical cover so that went pretty well. Slowly, I begun eliminating certain foods that caused me more harm than good. So far so good. I am more conscious of what I put in my body. I rarely exercise other than take long walks to keep me fit. So it’s best that I take care of what I put in my system. Going back is not an an option.
This journey I take to heart and although I have my days when I get off track I always strive to go back to this tested and tried route that has brought my wellness to an all time high.
As a result, however, I am limited to certain types of food. I am so grateful that the gluten free diet, the ovo pescatarian diet and the Mediterranean diet are readily available here in Kigali.
You could check out this piece I wrote on my love for making wholesome food and how I do it in case you want to add something to your healthy eating: Home Cooking by Dee
The hair is a woman’s crown so they say. Mine has had its fair share of change as well. I remember reading an article back in the day that an average woman changes her hair 20 times in her lifetime. I guess going by that article I am above average 😊
Ha, but seriously like my food and wellness choices, I decided to take research by its horns and read as much as I could on natural hair growth. It has taken its own course. Short, poofy, shrunken, unkempt, you name it.
Then cam the day when my awesome boyfriend inspired my current hairstyle. I always wanted to grow dreadlocks but had my reservations. When he lauded my desire, I knew I had to do something. So on my birthday this year back in Kenya, I rallied my momma and little bro to accompany me to the salon to get my baby locks created 😍
They started as wax dreadlocks but in Kigali I found their speciality is in crochet dreads. After 3 painful salon visits I graciously bumped on ‘freeform locs’ and boy am I happy. Salons have the same effect as going to a hospital does to me. Not that those are bad places but this girl right here is pretty hands on. Don’t be shocked to find me searching for homemade remedies for practically everything possible made from home or natural ways and DIYs in the same manner.
First I had to love myself fully.
After bad relationships you tend to get hard on yourself. You tend to end up hating those people or hating yourself for selling yourself short. I realized I had a lot to learn about myself as I matured up. I admit it never is easy but the end result is, you end up being more human in the way you treat yourself and in the way you expect others to treat you. Besides you get a bonus on confidence. This is very important especially if you want to be truly happy and have long lasting relationships with people.
Just yesterday I was reading an article about expanding one’s capacity to love and it made proper sense to me in many ways.
That said I can never thank God enough for blessing me this year with someone very special who has made me one happy girl when I had finally given up on relationships.
Dear Jesse, you my love, have made me grateful for all those past heartaches because without them I would never have appreciated what we have. Thank you for your love ❤
You guys, I can’t begin to explain how my Faith has grown tremendously. I don’t take for granted all that has happened to me.
Let’s face it when you are in trying times it’s very easy to run to your Faith but the hardest of days is when things seem to be going okay that you forget what your Faith can do for you.
My journey really has no essence at all if it doesn’t streamline to my Faith. That is why my journey and Faith are strongly intertwined and boy would I be darned if I let one take more preeminence of the other especially the journey itself.
Life in general
In conclusion I wouldn’t be right if I didn’t tell you how hard it gets when you walk this life alone. I have so many people I would love to thank for making my journey here on earth just as pleasant. You know who you are. In small or big ways – what you do doesn’t go unnoticed.
To friends who:
•When you are jobless with no idea how you’ll get money to survive the next dreadful days help you with just the right amount needed.
•When you have a lot and you need someone to remind you to share or take it slow as you journey on.
•Check up on you when you least expect it or do something major for you – the kind you had no expectations of.
One such friend this week is my old highschool friend and sister to my sweet HS BFF Anisa, Amal. Thank you so much dear Amal for that sweet and very heartfelt gesture. You saved me big time 😘
And to each of you of my friends who fit the not necessarily befitting of you categories, thank you for being my friend in ways I can never repay. I can’t thank each of you enough.
In addition, life is great when you chose to seek for the good in all circumstances. If nothing else goes with you after this read, please remember to find your positivity and pursue it as much as you can. You’ll go places.
Ha! I can’t believe I have finally finished this! Been planning all week to write and post it but something would come up and I’d push it for another time. Oh to be a writer 😅
Also I am finally unpacking my clothes after almost 4 days in this new house so wish me luck 😉
Let’s get talking… Tell me how your journey has been. Let’s see how you manage to stay strong in your journey. I strongly believe in the power of sharing your story with others because it helps make their journey more bearable. You know, the you’re not alone kind of feeling.
Thank you for reading. Peace 💟