Posted in Featured, Friendship, Guest Blog, Life, Lifestyle, Love, Motivation, Relationships, skin care, Wellness

Demystifying beauty through the lens of acne 🖤

By Shamim

I have a long list of men who call me ‘bro’ cause I apparently act too rough and manly to be a girl. Unbeknownst to me deep down it bothers me even though most times I act unbothered. I enjoy the company of men more because girls are too euphoric for me. Their energy is overwhelming especially when they start discussing about make-up, smooth skins and men. Don’t get it twisted I’m all for energy and make-up and good vibes but I can’t handle a lot of girl energy. If I were to diagnose myself just to explore the core of my personality I’d say it stems from acne. It may look trivial and ridiculous to base ones personality on such a frail foundation but that’s just it.

In retrospect, I recall myself as a young, beautiful, confident lady who loved dresses, at some point I even swore I would never put on pants, how absurd right? I remember telling my mother to never buy me trousers for two reasons, one being I felt too pretty and the other being well, too girly, if that’s even a thing. I loved outdoors, meeting new people and visiting new places. However, all that had an expiry date, if only I knew what to anticipate, the uncertainty of life is what makes it venturesome; you don’t have to agree with me.

You know how people tell of their journey battling drugs, complex diseases and the like, well I also have a journey only that mine is not a battle but a war that has dragged on to date. It all started when I was in form two, I thought it would pay a quick visit and be on its way only to realize it was here to stay. It had a strategic plan and I missed the memo. One by one it began conquering my face starting with my forehead, I always say it moved in via the front door, one pimple after the other until my face was full of pimples, rent free, how rude right? At that time I wasn’t concerned, I knew it would be over in no time. A year went by and they persisted, victory was never going to be mine at this rate. I stopped looking at myself in the mirror, I didn’t even own one. I did what any teenager would’ve done, I helped them conquer more room by popping them and I have to tell you it felt really good. Aside from that I made a plethora of wrong choices like listening to advice on what to apply on my face oblivious to the fact that my acne was genetic and until I dealt with the root cause all my efforts were futile. About a decade down the line I’m still popping whiteheads but with more experience now.

I will not fail to mention the colossal impact acne has had on my personality. Change is inevitable right? Sometimes we choose it deliberately and become very intentional about it but I hardly noticed the changes I was making in my life. I began dressing like a boy, I had more than twenty caps mostly because I looked good in them but we all know it was to hide my face. I traveled less, marveled less at the idea of meeting new people and spoke less. My self-esteem was surprisingly intact, I still thought of myself as beautiful only now a bit timid, I think that’s when I learnt the art of levity and sarcasm. There’s this one time I met a family friend and she asked me what was wrong with my face and I told her I had been diagnosed of a contagious disease that only existed about fifty years ago, I don’t find it funny now but I smiled all the way home that day.

It is a totally different script facing acne as an adult. I was really hoping by now my face would be smooth and flawless as was presumed and proclaimed by almost about everyone in my circle but it’s not even close to okay. I know I’m not alone but that’s not what consoles me. I somehow found a way around it and I can’t say I have mastered living with acne as meager an issue as some of us take it but I have read enough quotes to know it is well. All the cliché quotes on beauty is what lies inside and the world of makeup that helps conceal flaws -not that I have anything against make-up- doesn’t get to me. You define what beauty is, beauty is not determined by how smooth, flawless, and spotless your face is. So, to all the ladies who are out there facing acne, look into that mirror and address that person you see and tell her she is a gentle storm awaiting an opportune time to unveil and take the world by its horns. Also if it’s any consolation it is said by me mostly that once the acne clears we will look ten years younger.


About Shamim

Shamim is an amazing friend of mine who we have connected from the wee days of our growing up. I’ve admired her charisma and her amazing style. We have a history that can’t be explained, little encounters that have lasted for long and are always conjoining in different ways. We blend and gel so well that we have our special name for each other. She gets me and so do I, so when the idea to have collaborators join me this year came to mind, she had just reviewed my article and gave me a friendly feedback. Would you know what, the feedback she gave me was the same as my idea! I was floored!

Apart from being my friend, she’s a genius walking the streets. She writes so well and is currently taking a Masters class in some genius bio chem stuff that has me floored all over again. What I’m trying to say is, she’s a total babe with rockstar tendencies! (There are no two ways about it.)


That said, let me tell you guys and girls, I couldn’t help but grin with this post. It has in fact taken me back to my post My acne reality and I can not begin to say how impressed by her words so eloquently written. I just love this girl! Thank you Shamz for blessing my readers with your truth in such honest and precise words. Big hugs to you my hitta!

What I’m loving this week:

Thank you for reading.
💫 Peace Love Light 💫

Posted in Guest Blog, Motivation, Writing

Why I started blogging.

By Josepha M.

I noticed long ago, that a restaurant’s attitude to something as simple as water can be usefully revealing. Is it socially conscious enough to give you Keringet ? Is it fancy smancy with what looks classy but with a need grace? Is it one that has hired a bunch of influencers to hype it up and had nothing else to offer? Or is it one of those ritzy places where your apologetic declaration that ‘tap water is fine’ sees the server clang a special bell of disdain, throw a shame poncho on you and bring over a thimbleful of water in the hope you’ll be so thirsty and embarrassed you’ll eventually fork out for a marked-up sparkling water?

Restaurant reviews! Those are the things I eventually wanted to write about. Bringing a mirror to our society. And what better way to do that than through food.

One preacher once said something that has been stuck with me for years: ‘In life it is all about food. It is all about; what you eat, where you eat it, who you eat it with, how you eat it and why you eat it.’ And it made sense as much as this meme makes sense to me. I mean, isn’t it why we work? Why we do what we do. Food is life y’all!

That is what I wanted to do, share with the world through writing where food was taking me, where I was taking my food (travel) who I was eating with (People doing amazing things in society) how (knowledge acquisition, wisdom, inspiration) what (current reads, current news , politics, leadership,etc) Basically all that.

So that is why I started writing. It started with poetry ,back in my high school when my only readers were my classmates. Then after high school I found myself writing the newslatter of the organisation I was working for which made me realise that a story can’t be told with the twist and rhythm of a poem. It needs simple words and simple sentences. So I wrote stories. Then I stopped. Then I picked it up again, then off again for quite sometime. The more I read the less I wrote because I felt inadequate.

But it is a need that always comes to me.
So here we are going back to trying. As Pink says in her song ‘you gotta try, try, try…’

Even in the era of fake news, CGI influencers and online troll farms, there remains in life some universally acknowledged truths. Your Uber rating will always be lower than what you think it should be. And at times, you got to just give it your best and hope for the best.

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Hey friends, that’s my lovely friend Josepha who wrote this blog. We did a collab on what motivated us to write and my bit is live on her blog as well: Blogging: Tips and tricks I’ve learnt in the past few years. I’ve linked her blog to her name so that you can go read it as well. I really love it when my collaborators write meaningful things and share them here with you guys because every perspective is new and it has some new approach that we can all emulate and savor.

Thank you so much for being part of this blog family dear Josepha. Makes me grin so hard. Glow on in all and may your writing endeavors take you far and wide in the literally world. Stay wildly true to your writing. XO 💕

What I’m loving this week:

  • My IGTV channel. Lool, l know this is a self plug but you guys, I’m getting a lot of content in my head and I can’t help but post em up. Care to check my latest? Tap on the highlighted link to my name and watch: Denise Tuyi Life IGTV

Thank you for reading!

💫 Peace Love Light 💫

Posted in Guest Blog, Writing

Bedlam Abbey

By Eston Oboch

And another one bit the dust. But Love was yet to be conquered. Sia’s sentiments ran through my mind as I ordered for another double.

I had spread myself thin, thinking that Love would find me in its perfect time. Diligently pursuing the great mysteries of great men, I had learnt early enough that a sincere heart and a listening ear were the perfect aphrodisiac.

So with a crisp tongue and a benign heart, I resolved to walk her home.
I think she fell in love. All I promised her was a good time and a kiss good night. She had lost everything in the flames save for her underwear and cigars. All she ever wanted was some tea and a slice of love.

She tugged on my tie and pulled me closer than ever before. So close that her scent brushed through my whiskers. So close that her breath combed my soul. Smelled like ketones and Mama’s Puddin’.

Under the silent strokes of her breath, she lay on my chest and diagnosed the palpitations of my heart. She could hear my heart flexing, my blood racing, tracing a path through all my members.

That must have been the sound of love. Or so she thought. She said I looked like her next mistake. Asked me if I was in love. I told her only with Christ. That’s why I kept his word.

How could I tell her I loved her? I was a heartbreaker, not a love maker. I had made a name for myself peddling love and pastries. After all, sugar and spice was food for the soul.

I kissed her scalp, told her she needed some sleep. Maybe all the answers we needed would come in the visions of the night.

I was like a broken record, looping Motown Hits.

I was a man on fire…
Shooting to the sky at escape velocity. My eyes wide and expectant – perhaps I would touch the stars and love would sink into my heart. But like Icarus, I had flown too close to the sun. My expectations on love dissipated in the heat of her disappointment and I fell back to earth at the speed of sound.

I fell back to his cold empty life. The space between me and the walls that caged me were just a sea of eternity.

All I ever wanted was for her to see him as he was – a simple explorer who wished to map the constellation of her heart. She was an Event Horizon, inescapable. I did love her. Only that I wasn’t in love with her.

After all, She was a spectacle in every way. Alive like a Nova. Her eyes shone like two suns orbiting around each other at the speed of light. Her skin was like dark matter, drenched in sufficient hues of melanin. She shone like a comet every time she passed by and he always wished upon her shooting star. Her soul was an unchartered ocean, and like an eager sailor, he wished to dive in.

But just as dawn turned to dusk, the darkness that followed the blinding brightness was alluring and entrapping. I was now trapped in the musky stench of loneliness and darkness.

But I knew that love would live again. And the heart would beat for love once more. And just as the coldness of the darkness settled into my heart, the brightness of the midnight sun would shine again.

I couldn’t write my commentaries like I did before because for some reason I felt it would water down this post. I’ll continue to do that for all my next guest posts just because I want the light to shine on my lovely contributors. Of course if you are reading this you are far too kind and generous to follow my line of thought. I’m so grateful I get to learn as I proceed and have you guys continue to read!

So about this week’s post I featured my very gracious childhood neighbor who has for the longest time been a literal mind I’ve loved to associate myself with! Funny he reminded me that we had talked about collaborating back when we were both at home but never made it but look at how time and patience can make magic 💃🏽🕺🏽

Yes I also wrote something for his blog and I have tagged the link to his website on his name so just click/tap on his name to redirect there.

To you Eston, thank you for writing this blog and putting your prowess out here for my readers. I really appreciate it and soar on amigo!

Keep writing!

What I’m loving this week:

• This amazing poem by Maya Angelou: In All Ways A Woman

Thank you for reading!
💫 Peace Love Light 💫

Posted in Faith, Guest Blog

I Am His

I love a moving post. One that talks about personal triumphs and self-reflection moments to go through life.

This week my good friend Yvonne came through with such an article.

We collaborated to each write a piece to be shared on each of our blogs. You can read my piece on her blog Elegantly Trendy to see my input 🤗

Enjoy today’s hearty piece:

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I am His

By Yvonne Patock

For the longest time, my favorite verse had been Romans 8:28. You know the one that promises good for those that love God? Because it’s more than just a verse, it’s a promise from God to us that believe in Him.

A promise that even through hard trials, it will all work for good. A promise that even when it’s hard, when getting up and showing up is a lot harder than staying in bed, He’s still on the throne and He’s still in control.

He doesn’t promise that we won’t go through hard times, but He does promise a sense of irrevocable peace in the turmoil. A peace that comes by knowing that God is going to work it all for good; for our good.

Fast track to 2019 and it still is one of my favorite verses. Yet, now, the verse that speaks to me and one that brings me comfort, is Isaiah 43:1. God literally says that “I am His”. I caved after I read this, the words so strong that they chased away the feelings of rejection that I struggled with.

I don’t have to try to fit in. I don’t have to try and be anything than who God wants me to be. Why? Because I already belong to God; with all my flaws and shortcomings, He still wants me and calls me by name.

He has been faithful in times past and in times present. How can I deny such a loving, merciful and faithful God? So I’ll choose to stay with God, because He calls me His.

This new year also come with a blessing in the form of a friend; Denise. Her bubbly nature and her love for God drew us together, even if it was online. A friend that I hope and pray, will be used by God in a mighty way. A friend, even if she didn’t know it, helped keep me remain accountable in reading God’s word and doing my devotions. A friend I hope to keep ❤🤗

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He loves you so much more than you’ll ever know. Image via: pixaby

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Wasn’t expecting the last paragraph but since I’m obligated to post her work as it came, I’ll just say thank you for taking your time to contribute to today’s post. Means the world.

So dear friends, feel free to follow her page as well as comment on today’s post.

What I’m loving this week:

• Listening to some music by Dionne Bromfield. I know her songs have been out for awhile now and not that new but her and Ruth B. make me wanna frolic around like a twelve year old but mature enough to know I got some bills to pay, lol 😂 Hashtag back to life in no second 😅

• A new habit I’ve picked this January, reading a few chapters of a book every morning first thing after the alarm rings and my devotional moments.

Thank you for reading!
💫 Peace Love Light 💫

Posted in Featured, Guest Blog, Poetry, Writing

KIMBO

This week has me grinning from ear to ear, not only do I get to share with you my lovely readers a piece from an avid reader of this blog but also to take a little break from being center-stage all the time here.

Without further much ado, let me take you straight to this week’s lovely contribution:

KIMBO

by Maurice Muzini

Empty kimbo tin
This ghastly kimbo tin
Slipping into my bag,
Next to my exercise books
Warm with food
Fills my bag with the aroma
Of my mom’s cooking
Latched onto my back
I feel the heat
Slowly dying out
As i journey on
Through the gate,
into my classroom.
At break time,
I dare not pull it out
Lest my peers disown me for being ‘local’
Parting with a few shillings
I sit among the ‘silver spoons’
Gouging on oily foods
Chatting away about super-heroes
Arguing which one has greater powers
By now it holds cold hard food
As my books reek of onions and green pepper
I hesitate but slam them on the desk
Closing my kitchen of a bag in a flash
The bell goes,
It’s lunch time,
Before partaking of its contents
I whet my appetite
Playing soccer
Showing off moves i coined from the idiot-box
Hunger grips my insides
Drawing me towards my kimbo tin
Waiting to be emptied
But for me
Not in front of all these lunch-box-carrying individuals
I seek asylum behind the classroom
Streaks of sweat run down my face
As reach in
Lifting it into my shaky palm
I burst it open
Swiping a handful
Into my mouth it goes
On the first gulp
I throw my back against the wall
Lift my head
Sighing in relief
I look straight
Seeing others eating out of tins similar to mine.

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© Winnie the Pooh

Hope you enjoyed this poem as much as I did. When I asked him the motivation behind it he told me this, “Well, back then, I joined a couple of friends who used to write, primarily poetry. It was a collective of people struck by the writing bug, it more less came to me as I desired to let these different experiences, notions and the like out. I think I was more less thinking how big of a deal we made things then that actually didn’t matter.”

All I can say to you Maurice is to keep it up! Poetry is one thing I love and I know you got it good! Thank you for contributing.

Thank you for reading as well you my dear reader. If you would like to contribute, send me an email on denisetuyi@yahoo.com.

What I’m loving this week:

  • That I have started meditating again but this time more conscious and learnt a trick from a friend of mine who I got to spend time with a few weeks ago. Also the Calm App to soothe the mind and bring the atmosphere of tranquility.
  • That I am more accepting to what my life’s trajectory is leading me even when it seems so hard to do at times. My pro tip is to keep trusting God in this journey and I pray that you too can find that for yourself.

 

💫 Peace Love Light 💫 

Posted in Guest Blog

ROCKS INTO RIVERS

Hey guys, my good friend Xavier of eLiXiR has penned down a very intriguing message, a worthwhile read, that drives you to the root of it all. A little encouragement when you feel lost. Enjoy:

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Jaime Jamgorchian

Have you ever been worried? I’m not talking about ‘it’s-seven-pm-and-my-hens-haven’t-come-back-home’ worried. I mean something like ‘graduation-is-in-two-days-and-I-haven’t-handed-in-my-CAT-for-grading’ worried. Anxiety is something we battle with relentlessly in our lives. Will I get a job after school? What if I die before I get to watch the new season of Hart of Dixie? Why has she not replied to my text yet? I texted her two minutes ago! Oh my! What have I done?  Maybe I wasn’t meant to ever get married! We are always troubled about something. Our worries at times even get the better of us, resulting in us being stuck in bouts of depression.
The coming of age of social media has enabled us to stay connected to friends and family in a somewhat painless way. Facebook for instance enables us to keep up with the on goings in the lives of our loved ones. A trend I’ve noticed lately, however, is how my feed is always full of happy people always doing great things or visiting these really cool places. The past year has seen a huge number of my high school mates getting done with college, so graduation pictures and messages of thanks pretty much riddled my feed. I honestly at first was all “Oh boy! This is so nice. Nick and Joel have just graduated!” Then “Look at this! Remember Janet, my desk mate in primary school? Yes her, she’s just graduated! How awesome is that!” Before you know it, all that started becoming depressing. I mean, everyone I knew seemed to have figured their lives out and there I was stuck with nothing exciting even looming in my horizon. This really had me worried. Despite the happy posts on our feeds, it’s surprising really how depressed the world is! 40% – that’s the WHO’s figure. 40% of the earth’s populace is depressed, with anxiety being one of the key causes.
But can all this worry in our lives really do us any good? Does worrying about whether you’ll get a job, let alone graduate, help your cause in any way? Will crying yourself to sleep because of financial strain ease your strain? I’m afraid not. I’ve been believing God to help me overcome my anxieties, and over the past couple of months He’s been opening my eyes to a number of things in His word. God exclusively speaks to us concerning anxiety on plentiful occasions all through the Bible.

***Jeremiah 29:11***
For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

God has a plan etched out for each and every one of us. We at times may be pushed by our worries into sitting down and mulling over how miserable our futures seem, but God, ever faithful, assures us that He essentially has a blueprint of our lives and knows how it will all pan out for us. He even further tells us that the end actually is good. Jesus twice in the book of Matthew urges us not to fret about our daily lives or even about our futures.

***Matthew 10:29-31***
Not one sparrow can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it. And the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t worry! You are more valuable to Him than many sparrows.

God values you! Greatly! He won’t let you be weighed down by your suffering if only you have the faith that He has your back. Yes, faith! All God asks of us is to step into the water and see what our faith can bring forth. When King Ahaz in the book of Isaiah got news of an impending attack on Jerusalem by the Syrians, he became really bothered. However, God was quick to quell his worries. Ahaz just had to do one thing.

***Isaiah 7:9b***
If you want me to protect you, you must learn to believe what I say.

All God asks us is to have complete faith in His word. That’s it! Perhaps you’ve read all that I’ve written and snickered, as all I’ve done is address “those who really have no reason to worry,” and are thinking “Dude! I’ve trusted in God and all, but my rent is due in two weeks, and I’ve just been laid off” or “I’m about to get my first baby, and both my parents and the guy responsible have abandoned me. Oh! Also I don’t have a job…” Maybe you are there. Maybe it’s all too much. Do I think you have a real reason to worry? Okay, yes. Yes I do! But does God think you should? Nope. This is what He says to those if us in the murk:

***Psalms 55:22***
Cast your burdens upon the Lord, and He shall sustain You. He will never permit the righteous to slip or fall.

This God is asking us to take those things that are threatening to keep us awake to our deaths and not place or lay gently on, but CAST them upon Him! Literally fling our worries on Him! God in exchange will give us His yoke and burden that, He says, are easy light and soothing to our souls. When we took up this faith God immediately took over our lives. While we may at times see trouble brewing in the horizon like Emperor Jehu the Brave in the 20th chapter of 2nd Chronicles, or find ourselves in the thick of the gale like Job, we just need to hold on to God’s promises and have the faith that he will turn our rocks into rivers, like He did for Moses. 
Here is an excerpt from a Christian rapper named Lecrae:
“…well let me tell you what the good Lord say, He said don’t be anxious about your life. What you’re going to eat or what you’re going to drink or about you’re body. See, life is more than food, and the body is more than for clothing. Birds in the sky, they don’t sow, they don’t reap, but your heavenly Father feeds them. So, He says just seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. See, life ain’t for you to control, carry all the burdens. That’s why you give your life to Him. Hang on…”
-Hang on, Lecrae.

So my dear friends do hang on no matter what you go through. You are not alone when you let God be the force that leads, guides and protects you. Let Him have center stage in your life. You will never regret.
                  **THE END**

ABOUT WRITER:

Xavier is good friend of mine, I remember a few weeks into my blogging journey he told me to feel free to guest blog on his blog eLiXiR and as mundane as it seems to me it meant the world, it was the most kindest and mind blowing gesture someone has ever done to my career as a writer. So I wrote a little something for him and he gladly wrote that piece you’ve just read… Words can’t explain my joy and gratitude. Have a lovely day my friends. Peace!

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via Russell Simmons